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How To Be Yourself

photo by: o palsson

You have probably heard the advice “be yourself” many times.  It seems simple enough, and usually feels good to hear.  But many people don’t have a clue how to do it.

There is really only one thing you need to remember as you are trying to be yourself:

Go towards what you are attracted to.

This is the cardinal rule of being yourself.  It’s pretty simple, really, but can be difficult to put into practice.

There are many reasons why you might not go towards what you are attracted to.

You don’t know what that is.
You don’t trust yourself.
You put other obligations first.
You don’t have time.
You feel what you are attracted to is “bad.”
You are not paying attention to what you are attracted to.
You are trying to impress other people.

When you begin to surround yourself with things you are attracted to, you are essentially surrounding yourself with You because what you love expresses who you are.  Everything around you is a form of self expression.  Make those things count!  Surround yourself with things that you love!

So, next time you hear someone say “just be yourself,” start looking around for things that you are attracted to, and then pursue them.

You will be yourself in no time.

Any other ideas on the phrase “Be Yourself”?  How do you define “being yourself”?  Please share in the comments!

Published inPersonal Growth


  1. Hi Amanda — I like that take on being yourself — that it’s really about following your instincts — and in my experience practices, like yoga, that get me really in touch with the sensations I’m feeling get me more attuned to what I’m wanting in each moment.

  2. Hi Amanda,

    To ‘be yourself’ is indeed wise advice. As is surrounding yourself with things you love.

    Once people start to grasp a sense of who they really are, it’s so beautiful – so divine, that from then on, they will struggle to be anyone or anything but themselves.

    Wishing you and your loved ones all the very best for 2010,

    Shine on, Amanda,

    Robin 🙂

  3. Love this post!! Such great common sense and you’ve given me some fodder to follow my instincts and my loves! Thank you 😀

  4. Amanda — I love what you said in this post, especially the idea of surrounding myself with the things I love. I am doing so now…much more than I have done before in my life. My office is filled with reminders of who I really am.

    But it’s not just “things,” it’s also my beliefs about myself. For years, I was told by others who I am, but I no longer listen to them. Now I say my own beliefs about myself. I speak them aloud and loudly so that I can hear them.

    Thank you so much for this post. It’s perfect for the New Year:~)

  5. Amanda Linehan Amanda Linehan

    Hi Chris – Absolutely, I also seek out activities (yoga included) that help me to use my intuition better. If I feel too “clogged up” I can’t quite seem to follow my instincts as well.

    Hi Robin – I agree. I was thinking that once you start being yourself, there’s a certain momentum that occurs and it gets a little easier to really surround yourself with what you love.

    Hi Eden – Thanks a lot!

    Hi Sara – Right. The way that you view yourself is huge in terms of being yourself. You can leave behind images of yourself that don’t serve you and develop new ones that do. 🙂

  6. Amanda,

    This is such a great post. The “be yourself” mantra is one of those things that are always easier said than done and you pinpointed exactly why it’s so difficult to often do for some people.

    Whenever I find myself faltering or wondering who I am, whenever I try to remind myself to “be myself,” my own mantra is “stop trying to be everyone else.” It puts things into perspective, helps you realize you’re you, you’re special for a reason. Because I think when you stop trying to be like everyone else, that’s when the real you appears anyway.

    Thanks for the thoughts, as always. Your site has always been one of my favorites for exactly this — you’re yourself and you stay true to that. Keep that up. Hope you’re having a happy new year!

  7. Amanda Linehan Amanda Linehan

    Hi Susan! – I think that’s a great way to put yourself in the right frame of mind. “Stop trying to be everyone else” is a good reminder anyways. Being yourself is strangely difficult, but well worth the journey to get there.

  8. vasu vasu

    Hi Amanda,

    Looks like I finally got the mantra for being ‘ My Self ‘
    I always pretended like someone else, whom i got influenced.
    and i think there is a limit you can pretend to be what you are not.
    Thanks a lot.. Wish I had seen this post 10 years back!

  9. Amanda Linehan Amanda Linehan

    Hi Vasu – Yes, and when you hit that limit, you know it!

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